


Be Cool, Ben

by OurLadyOfRebellion



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Coming of Age, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Other, Star Wars Modern AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-19 09:20:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29997198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OurLadyOfRebellion/pseuds/OurLadyOfRebellion
Summary: Inspired by "Your Pretty Little Heart" by @Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo)Before Ben Solo becomes a brooding surgeon, he is a highschool alpha who needs a safe space to talk through what his designation means for his future. After a situation at school that costs Ben his friendship with newly designated omega Tai and ostracizes him from his peers, Leia and Han set him up on a camping trip with his favorite Tío, Chewy, who has more to teach Ben than he anticipated.
Relationships: Ben Solo & Tai, Ben Solo/Tai
Kudos: 7





	Be Cool, Ben

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Your Pretty Little Heart](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14388135) by [Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ever_So_Reylo/pseuds/Ever-so-reylo). 



> CW: allusions to sexual assault, acknowledgement of historic and in universe violence, pseudo teen romance, allusion to sexual dreams had by a teenager. No one is physically or sexually hurt in this fic. Just a lot of teenage feelings.

Be cool, Ben.

“You got everything, kid?”

Ben nods yes as he shoves his sleeping bag into the back seat of the Jeep.

“You put that money in your sock like I told you?” Ben nods again.

“Han, they’re just going camping.”

Han takes another sip from his coffee as if he didn’t hear Leia standing right next to him in the garage. “Keep it safe, kid.”

“Maybe you want to put your jacket on? At least until the sun comes up.” Ben is a little cold. Just a little. But he shakes his head no. Leia just shrugs. Her hair is down, raven’s wings over the shoulders of her pale blue turtleneck. She puts an arm around Han’s waist, covered in quilted tan flannel. Ben looks away. The trunk door slams shut and Chewy walks around the front of the car, all six feet and seven inches of him. Ben is tall for his age. Skinny, but tall. Han is tall. But Chewy is a giant among men. Quiet and brown with a long thick beard.

“I guess you should get going, then,” Leia sighs. She’s giving him that look. That, “Where did my baby go?” look. And Ben is wondering the same thing. He is forgetting what it was like to be shorter than his mother.

Chewy takes a few steps, that’s all he needs, and Leia disappears into a hug. Then he hugs Han, who smiles ruefully into his coffee when let go.

“Take your time coming back.”

“Han! You come back immediately if you need to. If you need anything. And Chewy has a satellite phone, so don’t worry. You’re not alone.” She has sidled up to him and gotten her arms around his neck, planting a kiss on his cheek before he can protest. “I love you, Ben. Be safe. And have fun.”

He doesn’t look at her but he says, “Ok, mom.” Then Chewy points at the Jeep with his chin and they’re finally pulling the doors closed and putting on their seatbelts. Backing out of the Organa-Solo driveway and rolling through the suburbs that Ben has known all his life.

Chewy puts on public radio. He looks over at Ben every once in a while. Takes a drink from his thermos sometimes. The streets turn into roads and then the roads turn into highway and the sky is gold and blue as the sun comes up. It’s a beautiful, clear day. Perfect for a hike. But Ben feels… he thinks squeamish is the right word.

He likes his Uncle Chewy. A lot. He brought him the best birthday presents. Chemistry set. Box collection of Tolkien. Had the sharpest one liners that always shut Han up. But he’d never spent time alone with Chewy like this. This long. A whole weekend. And they weren’t doing it because Ben had asked, or even Chewy had asked. Han had asked. And he’d asked because, “Chewy’s the only alpha I trust.”

“What about mom?”

“You’re mom doesn’t count.”

It had taken Han a long time to get it out when Leia left them alone at the dinner table while she went back to her endless emails and faxes in her home office.

“There are things you need to know about all this,” he moved his hand around, “this alpha stuff. And you won’t let your mom talk to you about it-”

“Ew.” Ben had grimaced. Cringed. It was true. Leia had tried, and Ben had tried because the information he got from his high school health instructor, Mr. Krennic, was vague. At best. But the minute Leia said “bulbus glandis” Ben insisted he’d be fine. That he’d go to the library.

“Being an alpha is more than physiology, Ben,” she’d said.

So here he was, in Uncle Chewy’s Jeep, going on a camping trip to learn whatever it is he couldn’t find in the library.

“I know it’s weird,” Chewy finally said. “I wasn’t sure either, when your dad called me. Well, he tried texting me first, but he wasn’t making any sense so I called him.”

“Of course.” Ben couldn’t be surprised by Han anymore.

“We’re going to fish. And we’re going to hunt. And all you have to do is listen. You know I’m not a man of many words.”

That was true. Ben was pretty sure if he could pinpoint his first comfortable silence with someone other than his parents it was Chewy. They were probably watching “Time Bandits” or a baseball game while waiting up for Han to get home from wherever he wasn’t supposed to be. Leia directing rounds at the hospital and not wanting Ben to be home alone.

After another few hours they pulled over to a rest stop. Chewy put gas in the Jeep and then they walked over to the 24 hour diner located conveniently next door. They sat in a sticky booth and Ben looked out the sticky window into the small parking lot while Chewy perused a newspaper someone had left on the seat. Waiting for someone to come take their order.

“Come on, Berta. I’ve told you, you can’t do this again.” A voice rose from the kitchen window behind the counter. Ben couldn’t see who was talking but he could see a round, dark skinned girl, barely a woman, coming through the kitchen door.

“Kenny, I can work at least another shift. Please. I can’t be late on rent again.” Berta’s shoulders were slumped, but her chin was up. Determined.

Everyone else in the pale fluorescent yellow dining room either pretended not to hear what was happening or didn’t care. Ben heard Chewy put the paper down, but he kept watching.

“Cy and his boys are gonna be here any minute. You can’t be here smelling like that. Now go home. If I can write you in when you come back I will. I’m not firing you. I’m just telling you you have to go home.”

Berta’s shoulders seemed to slump a little further, her hands in fists at her sides. But all she did was nod, resigned, and walked away. She disappeared down the hall to the restrooms and then reappeared with a coat and a purse, walking right past their booth. She was pretty, curls piled on top of her head in a little black net. Full lips. Her dark brown eyes were shining wet. And then she stopped and looked right at him.

He’d been staring. And now he could smell her. He was mortified.

“Mind your business.”

“He’s working on it.” Chewy’s voice, sudden and rumbly.

She did a little sniff and her eyes grew wide. She started backing away from them. “I’m sorry." To Chewy, "Sir. I just-”

“No, please. I’m sorry.” Ben managed to eek out. He was not… like that. He backed away, pushed himself against the window as much as he could. He took shallow breaths as quietly as he could. Through his mouth. She hurried off, the bells on the door ringing as it squealed slowly closed after her.

“Oh god.”

“It’s ok.”

“Oh fuck.”

“Ben, it’s ok.”

“Why did she- why was she here. I thought they never came out. Like that.”

Chewy picked up the paper again. “She needed rent.”

“Who let her come to work?”

“Ben.” Chewy never yelled at Ben. But the way he said his name felt like a yell.

Someone from the kitchen came out to take their order.

“Apologies, we’re short staffed today.” It was the voice from earlier; Kenny. Chewy ordered a short stack combo with ham steak and coffee, so Ben ordered the same thing. “If you need anything else, ring the bell by the register and I’ll come out."

Eventually the short order cook returned with their coffee, and then again with their food. Ben mimicked Chewy’s ritual of spreading butter on every available surface of pancake before drizzling syrup on top. They ate quietly and sipped their coffee. When they finished, Ben stacked their plates and Chewy pulled a few bills from his worn wallet and stuck them under the salt shaker before starting for the door.

“I’m going to use the bathroom.” Ben said. Chewy nodded and headed out. Ben did go to the bathroom. And while he was in there, he pulled his shoe off and dug the bills out of his sock. He went back into the dining room and walked up to the register. He was sweating. An old man sitting at the counter doing a crossword gave him a once over. Ben wiped his free hand on his shirt and then dinged the bell. It took a minute, but Kenny came out soon enough.

“Everything alright? Can I get you gentlemen anything else?”

“No. We’re good. Thanks.” Ben held out his fist full of twenties. “This is for her, I mean, Berta. Make sure she gets it.”

“Wow kid, you sure?”

“All of it," Ben said, as steady as he could. "I mean it.” Kenny’s face went a little slack but he gently pried the money from Ben’s sweaty hand.

“Ok. I will.”

Ben took a deep breath and walked back to the Jeep. Chewy was in the driver’s seat looking at a trail map while Ben buckled in.

“How much do I owe Han?”

“What?”

“How much did Han give you?”

“A hundred. Hundred twenty.”

“Alright.”

“Mom’s just going to give it back to you.”

“Han doesn’t need to know that.”

***

It was noon when they got to the trailhead and started out with all their gear on their backs. Sleeping bag. Extra boxers and socks. Moisture wicking jacket with removable insulation. Collapsible fishing pole. Rifle. Chewy carried a knife and an axe. He handed Ben a thermos.

“For the hike up. We’re not stopping until we get to the cabin.”

Ben unscrewed the top and peered into the aluminum cylinder. White hominy floated around in a cloudy pale green broth with chunks of carrot, onion, and pork.

“Pozole?”

“Sí, guey.”

Ben liked Chewy’s pozole. Things were looking up.

They marched on under the shade of tall trees and to the rhythm of their creaking gear, buzzing insects, and intermittent bird calls.

But just as Ben felt the last of his awkward teenage alpha tension melt from his shoulders Chewy said, “What did she smell like to you?”

“Uh…” Ben looked up at Chewy’s back. Well, his pack, anyway. Chewy kept going, almost like he hadn’t said anything. But he had.

“My abuela hung all our laundry out to dry in the sun and when you’d sleep on her sheets at night it was like being out in the sunshine. That’s what she smelled like to me. Sunshine.”

“Oh. I didn’t… I’m not sure. But… nice. I guess.”

“They all smell a little different. Like a fingerprint. You spend enough time with one, you’ll never forget.”

“Yeah. I know.”

“You do?”

“There’s this boy in my class. Sits in front of me. Used to sit in front of me. Tai. I didn’t know it at the time. That he was an omega. He didn’t even know until... But I... remember.”

“Hm.”

“He smelled like, I don’t know. Bread, maybe.”

“Did you like him?”

Ben stopped walking. Chewy looked over his massive shoulder at him.

“He stopped talking to me. After.”

“Oh. Right. Leia said his parents took him out of school. When he presented.”

“She told you?”

“She told me everything she thought I should know. But I didn’t know his name. Tai.”

Ben wiped his nose on his arm. His chest was tight. Chewy turned back around and moved on, but slowly. Ben waited until Chewy went around a bend in the trail and then he jogged to catch up.

***

At the cabin they had to sweep away some spider webs, but the sink pump worked fine and Ben was more than happy with the top bunk, even if he barely fit. Chewy showed him how to hold the axe to cut firewood and pointed out what wood was ok to use and what to avoid. They built a fire in the hearth and when it got dark they made instant cocoa and ate some sandwiches Leia had packed. Lots of salty Italian cold cuts and thick slices of havarti.

“So what do you think you know?”

“Not much,” Ben said around a mouthful of sandwich. “At school they were just like, avoid poorly ventilated rooms. Take your blockers or suppressants. Track your… cycles. Keep your paperwork up to date. Mom tried to give me more, detail, I guess. But, well, she’s my mom.”

“The most important thing you need to know is that omegas are people like everyone else.”

“I know that.” Ben huffed.

“They see and hear everything that we do. Everything they say about us. All the stereotypes. The good and the bad. They are having just as hard a time as you if not more.”

“Well at least no one thinks they’re” Ben paused to make air quotes with his fingers, “dangerous.”

“Maybe,” Chewy said after a sip of cocoa. “But just like we hate having betas feel threatened by us, omegas hate being told that they’re weak, or needy, or only good for having babies. So the next time you think, ‘Why would an omega be outside in heat?’ remember today.” Chewy’s voice had been even. Almost monotone. But Ben’s shoulders were up around his ears.

“There are almost no omegas left in Juarez. Where my family is from. They were kidnapped and murdered by cartels. By alphas.”

“Alphas?”

Chewy looked into the fire and nodded.

“Why would they do that?”

“Because omegas aren’t weak. They were the first to stand up to the cartels. They organized. Refused to be mated to anyone in the cartels. Had heats on their own for almost a year. But that didn’t last.”

“No one stopped them?”

“Some tried, but bribery and violence go a long way. There’s a history of alphas killing off native omegas so they couldn’t subvert their control. Alexander the Great did it. Cleopatra. Charlamagne. Columbus. Catherine the Great. Well, she dismissed them all from her court, but there are stories.”

“I still don’t understand. If we’re programmed, or whatever, to want omegas, why would we ever hurt them?”

“Omegas, the right omega, can make an alpha do anything. They can compromise you. Many alphas don't react well to that.” Chewy shrugged his shoulders and sighed. "Someone having control over you like that? It's scary. Fear makes people do bad things."

Ben thought that was a little dramatic. Surely he wouldn't have to worry about that. “But not if I stay on my blockers, right?”

“Mostly.”

“Mostly?”

“Get some rest.” Chewy tipped back the last of his cocoa. “If you want to eat tomorrow you have to catch it.” He brushed his teeth at the pump, banked the fire, and then kicked off his boots before tucking his large frame into his sleeping bag. Ben stared into the fire and waited until he could hear Chewy lightly snoring before brushing his teeth and following suit.

As he watched the fire light flicker across the ceiling he realized it was something sweet. The waitress. Berta. To him, she had smelled like vanilla. Maybe.

***

Ben awoke to the sounds of Chewy lumbering around the small cabin. Washing up at the pump and boiling water for coffee. Ben unzipped himself from his sleeping bag and tried not to shiver in the cool morning air. After coffee and granola bars, Chewy watched Ben put his fishing pole together. Checked the line and tackle. Then they headed down to the river.

“Are you going to tell me something like, ‘Being an alpha is like fishing?’”

“No. That doesn’t make any sense.”

“Ok. Good.”

“Being an alpha is like camping.”

Ben rolled his eyes. Chewy chuckled.

“I’m serious, Ben.”

“How is being an alpha like camping?”

Chewy stopped to admire the river coming into view as the trees thinned out.

“Well, what’s the first rule of camping?”

Ben knew this. Luke, his least favorite uncle, had taught him. But this could’ve easily been a trick question. He pretended to test his grip on his pole.

“Leave no trace. Right?”

“Right.”

“Really?”

“Really.” But he didn’t say anything else.

Chewy set Ben a little further up stream with the creel.

“Whatever you don’t catch, I’ll clean up after you,” he grinned. And then it was just the sound of the water, the wind, their reels. Ben knew how to fish, but he’d never felt like he was good at it. He’d caught some smelt when he was younger. A few carp he threw back. The trout. He’d gotten his fingers wrapped in the line, desperate to keep it, to finally have something to show for his efforts, but Luke had cut the line and Ben watched it disappear into the water.

“I’m not sending you home to Leia with less fingers than you left with. She’d kill me,” he’d said. Ben knew he was right. He’d already had a cut to show for it and he needed two stitches. But still.

His pole suddenly twitched in his hands.

It twitched again.

He let whatever was on the line take it’s time, waited until...There! The line was going. He got his fingers on the handle and reeled it in. The fish fought him, but it must not have been very big because he felt it come through the water towards him pretty easily. The fish broke the surface of the water, splashing and flapping. A perch. Maybe 7 inches. Ben waited until the perch was dangling a foot or so from the pole before setting his pole and getting it off the hook. A tricky business he’d almost forgotten how to do because it’d been so long since he’d caught anything. He held the fish in his hands, felt its panicked tremors as it gasped in the open air.

“You get to eat tonight.” Chewy had sneaked up on him. “Buen trabajo.” Chewy was smiling, so Ben let himself smile before carefully sliding the perch into the creel while Chewy baited his hook with another piece of minnow.

They caught more perch, and a bass, thanks to Chewy, before heading back to the cabin to start cooking for lunch.

“So what does ‘leave no trace’ have to do with being an alpha?” Ben finally asked.

“We, people, can have a serious effect on the environment, so we clean up our trash. We don’t over fish or over hunt. We find a way to live in balance. Or we should, anyway. Being an alpha is the same thing. What did you tell that man at the register?”

Ben looked away. “To give her the money.”

“But what did you say?”

“I said ‘Make sure she gets it. All of it. I mean it.’”

“And how did you say it?”

“I don’t know,” Ben shrugged. “I just said it.”

“You’re young, but it’s probably stronger in you than you think. El voz.”

Alpha command. There were legends in every culture. Perseus demanded Cetus return Andromeda and lay down his life. Anansi the trickster spider couldn't lie to an alpha. Ben remembered how the man's face had changed when he said "I mean it."

"I just wanted to make sure she got the money. That she'd be ok."

"In that instance I don't blame you." They'd reached the cabin and Chewy handed Ben the creel. "Start scaling these, I'll get the fire."

Ben pumped water into the sink and grabbed the scaling tool. He got to work on the perch and Chewy joined him pretty soon with his big knife, gutting and chopping off the heads and filleting. Ben got the old iron skillet off it's hook on the wall and the dusty tin of olive oil. He got it wiped down and on the fire in the hearth.

"The thing is," Chewy continued, as if it hadn't been almost half an hour since he'd last spoken, "if that's how a beta you've never met acts, imagine the effect you'd have on an omega who likes you. They _want_ to do whatever you tell them. The only way to know if an omega wants you for you is to avoid telling them what to do. It's better to just ask them. That way they can say no."

He brought a few of the fillets over and carefully laid them down into the pan where they began to loudly sizzle. The smell curled up from the hearth and floated through the cabin.

"Choice is sacred, Ben." He looked up and saw that Chewy was staring him right in the face. "You can't ever take that away from someone. Especially not an omega."

There was something warm and sharp underneath the buttery fish smell. It was Chewy. His scent was trying to tell him something. It underlined his words. Punctuated them. Like neon highlighter in his head. Ben started to open his mouth when Chewy's giant brown hand found his shoulder and gave it a squeeze. Ben closed his mouth. He looked his uncle in the eye and nodded.

"Don't burn those. I got Valentina in my pack if you want some."

Ben couldn't say it. That more than anything else about being an alpha, it was hearing "no" that scared him.

***

They were up early again, going over their rifles. Chewy was showing Ben what the bolt should feel like. Checking the chamber. How to hold the butt against his shoulder. Because apparently everything Han had told him was wrong.

"I think it just feels different because I'm taller than last time."

"When was the last time?"

"Maybe four years ago?"

Chewy nodded. Then with a completely serious face he said, "Your alpha voice is like a rifle."

Ben blinked.

"I'm serious. You should only use it when you need to."

"We don't _need_ to hunt," Ben rolled his eyes and sighed.

"You need to eat. You don't need to make people feel small or get your way all the time or boss people around."

"I am not bossy!" Mom- Leia is bossy. She's a hospital director, and she tells people what to do all the time. And they do it. No one listens to Ben.

Chewy just pulled his rifle up on his shoulder, the tan leather strap straining over his buffalo check flannel. "¿Estás listo?"

Ben blew a breath out of his nose. "Yeah," he said sheepishly as he shouldered his rifle.

They walked in the direction of the trail head but soon took a different trail. The sky was blue gray, waiting for the spring sun. But the birds were wide awake without the sun and had plenty to say in the trees around them.

"I know you're not bossy. But everyone else isn't me. You have to remember that. Everyone else probably just sees an alpha and even when you're right, even if you're the smartest person in the room, they're going to decide you're just another pushy alpha."

"I thought we had to be quiet or we'd scare the deer away," Ben groaned, half under his breath.

"You have choices," Chewy continued anyway, "You can be quiet. You can be overly polite. You can only speak when it's important. You can take up all the air in the room. But no matter what you choose, you have to remember that people are going to stereotype you. So start thinking about about how you want to be around people, what's going to work for you, and then own it. Because you're going to have to deal with it every day. For the rest of your life."

"I shouldn't have to act any different from anyone else," Ben says, trying to sound as cold as possible.

"I agree," Chewy said. "That's why I'm telling you all of this. This whole weekend is about why you shouldn't have to. But making friends, getting jobs, dating-" Ben rolls his eyes at that, "when shit doesn't work out because other people have put you in a box, I don't want you to be surprised. I don't want you to get angry. I don't want you to turn around and do the same thing to someone else."

"I don't want to talk about this anymore." Ben feels hot tears welling up and he's not sure why. His chest is tight again. But Chewy isn't walking ahead like last time. They've just… stopped walking. Chewy is looking at him. Waiting for something. Ben can't tell what. He's too busy trying not to cry.

"I told him, Tai, I told him I'd never… that I'd never hurt him. But he was…" Ben is crying now. He can't see through his tears. There's snot coming out of his nose. "The teacher sent me to the bathroom to check on him, he'd been gone almost half the period. He was in the wheelchair stall, crying. And the closer I got, the better- the better he smelled."

"First heat?" Chewy guesses in a quiet voice.

Ben just nods. Takes a minute to clear his nose and his throat. Wipe his tears.

"He opened the stall door. I just… I just smelled him. I asked him if he was ok, if he wanted the nurse. I would've given him the shirt off my back if he wanted. I think I wanted to. To like, hold him. I thought about kissing him. And he put his hand out and I took it. And we just held hands for, I don't know how long. But then I think, I think he panicked. Pushed past me. Ran to the nurse's office. He never came back to school. And everyone said… they said all kinds of fucked up shit behind my back about it but the thing I heard was that he went into heat from sitting next to me. That like, I made him go into heat. That I _made_ him an omega. And I _know_ that's not how it works, mom showed me all these books, but…"

They don't go hunting. Ben doesn't even notice at first that they're walking back to the cabin. He's just following Chewy. They go back to the river instead and when the sun's the highest it'll go, they go swimming, rifles forgotten on the shore. Chewy suddenly "remembers" some pasta he had in the Jeep and they eat that instead.

"I didn't want to hunt, anyway. Sorry." Ben says sheepishly after a mouth full of fusilli.

"It's ok. No one should be holding a gun when they're working through feelings like that. But thanks for letting me know. Next time we'll just fish. Maybe try some new trails."

"Next time?"

"Oh, you too good to go camping with your Tío now?"

Ben smirks and then they both chuckle.

"I'm just saying, you can talk to me, Ben. You deserve that. We all do."

It's quiet again. The fire crackling. Night sounds of crickets and little animals scurrying.

Ben finds the courage and finally asks, "Have you ever, uh, been with one? With an omega?"

Chewy nods 'yes'.

"What's it like?"

Chewy blows out a long breath. "I say this in all seriousness; it's beautiful."

"Beautiful?" That's not at all the word Ben was expecting. What did guys say about sex? Hot?

Chewy shrugs. "You asked."

It's quiet again. Ben wonders how impolite it would be to ask for more… information. But luckily, Chewy saves him the embarrassment.

"She didn't want to be mated. She was career minded and her designation already counted against her. If she was mated, she was afraid no one would take her seriously. I agreed. So we had to be careful. I had to be careful."

"Is it…," Ben started. Thought about it. Started again. "How were you careful?"

"Alpha instinct is to mate. Our minds, our bodies, don't know the difference between casual and committed. So you have to be careful. Take your time. Breathe. Just think about whatever you want to do before you do it. And it sounds weird, but tell them, any partner you have, tell them what you're gonna do before you do it. It helps you control yourself, and more importantly, gives them a chance to say no."

This was it. Part of Ben knew they were working up to this. That this was what Leia and Han had intended all along. It was now or never.

"When Tai ran away from me that day… It was like he took my insides with him. I felt like I was gonna throw up. I don't think… I don't ever want to feel that way again. That sick feeling."

Chewy looked him in the eye.

"Then don't get with an omega."

"What?"

"If you can't stomach the rejection, I'm sorry, but that's your only option."

"That's it?" Ben was hot. He could feel sweat appearing under his shirt. He was on his feet without thinking while Chewy stared him down coolly from the other side of the hearth. "You drag me all the way out here just to tell me to stay away from omegas?"

Chewy shrugs like Ben asked him what time it was. Like they weren't talking about the rest of his whole life.

"There is zero guarantee that you won't ever feel that way again. The only way to make sure you don't is to stay away from omegas. But you already knew that, Ben. You're smart like your mother. Ask me what you really want to ask me. It's ok."

Ben blows out a frustrated breath. Pushes his hair off of his suddenly sweaty forehead. He looks at Chewy. Chewy's looking back at him so he looks at the fire instead. Lets the flames distract him from his anger long enough to find the words.

"What do I do if it happens again?"

Chewy nods approvingly.

"If they say 'no' or they… leave. You say 'ok' and you let them leave. If you let yourself think about it, you can do it. Alphas walk away from what they want everyday. You can, too. The rest is chemicals. So you flush your system. The longer you've been with or around an omega, the longer it will take to get their smell out of your head. The fastest way is to avoid anywhere the smell is."

Ben scoffs. "Like leave town?", he means it as a joke. But Chewy's face doesn't change.

"I didn't come to the states for work."

"Oh." And that's all Ben can say.

"It's really just math. What's worse? Being miserable for a while? Or making someone else miserable? Or doing something you'll regret, can't fix or take back?"

Ben nods. "Yeah," he says. "Yeah," he says again.

Ben dreams of Tai. He dreams of the things he wanted to do in the bathroom that day. The things he found himself thinking about staring at the back of Tai's head. His neck. Things part of him already knew they wanted before Ben understood why.

***

On the drive home they skip the diner and stop somewhere else for gas and pizza. There's very little talking, but it's comfortable. That awkward feeling from two days ago is gone. Chewy pulls up the Organa-Solo driveway late Sunday afternoon. Han is there to greet them but Leia is gone.

"Some kind of database crash," Han says as he walks Ben's borrowed rifle to the lock box in the garage. "She's worried the surgeons will cut the wrong people open." Ben was just glad Han didn't ask about the sock money. Yet.

Chewy walks Ben to his room.

"You ever see her again? The omega?"

"Not in person, no," Chewy sighs. "I see her on the news sometimes. BBC. Univision. CNN."

"The news?"

"She's a journalist. She's still single. But I can see in her face, she's happy. She's got tons of awards. I have all her books. I'm proud of her."

That actually makes Ben smile.

"Hasta luego?" Chewy asks.

Ben nods. "Hasta luego, Tío."


End file.
